What Are You Thankful For?

I stole this picture. I'm thankful that I was able to steal this picture.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

I’ve officially achieved the next level in holiday greetings for the 21st century. I’ve evolved from the mass, impersonal “Happy Thanksgiving” text to the just strictly “Happy Thanksgiving” status updates on Facebook/Twitter to now a “Happy Thanksgiving” on my blog. And along with a formal greeting comes a list of things that make me smile with glee.

I’m thankful for…

  • The Raiders pulling themselves out of the NFL gutter this season, sitting pretty at the top of the AFC West with a 6-4 record. I’m also thankful for Darren McFadden, but those two go hand-in-hand.
  • Michael Bush and I’m happy he’s our backup RB.
  • Phillip Rivers’ amazingly dichotomous year. I’m thankful that he’s a good fantasy quarterback but fails terribly in his real-life quarterback role.
  • The Niners being 9-1. Yes, I’ve accepted it. Only because I’m excited to see them get their ass kicked in the wild card-round of the playoffs. Oh wait, they’ll probably have a bye cause their division already mailed it in and decided to enter the offseason with 5 weeks left in the regular season, so let me rephrase. I’m excited to see them get their ass kicked in the division round matchup to prove them as the frauds they are.
  • Marc-Eduoard Vlasic. They should just hand him the Norris trophy now (19 games into the season). *The Norris trophy, for any new hockey fans I’ve converted with my two part NHL primer, is awarded to the best offensive defenseman at the end of the season.
  • My tickets to the Sharks-Canucks game on Saturday. First matchup of the season after their fluke WCF series win. It’ll be glorious. I hope Ryane Clowe gets an even bigger fine than the one he got against Stephan Robidas, only this time for slashing/roughing/taking his skate off and trying to stab Alex Burrows. It’ll be well-worth the money, Clowey. Do it.
  • The NBA Lockout. Barring me moving to Canada, the only way I’ll be able to see real hockey coverage here in Amuricah is through ESPN. Because the NBA doesn’t exist right now, they’re showing more hockey highlights on their programming. Granted, the coverage is pretty garbage, but it’s just nice to see.
  • Bill Simmons. He’s my proxy with regards to the lockout. You want to know how I feel? Listen to the Stein and Bucher podcast on the bottom of this page (It’s a two-parter, 2-hours long. So yeah, I had some free time in my oh-so-busy life). Simmons and I — it’s like he reads my mind.

I have nothing to be thankful for in baseball. I don’t watch enough of it to know what I should be thankful for. I guess I’m thankful the A’s are still here and haven’t relocated, yet. Although, that’s still a very real possibility. If anything, I’m unthankful that the A’s have to play in that sorry excuse for a ballpark. You want to talk about a dump? The Coliseum is it. And Candlestick is pretty dumpy, too. I’m also unthankful that the A’s fan base, while passionate and loyal, is quite small and not nearly rich enough to keep them where they’re at. It’s a sad time to be an A’s fan, it really is.

Most of all, I’m thankful for Brent Burns’ Twitter. And this suit. I love you, Burnzie. Please don’t ever change.

Happy Turkey Day! Eat lots of food and watch lots of football. Then say “FUCK BLACK FRIDAY!” and go to sleep til Cyber Monday. American traditions are the best.

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